Week 12: Sorry seems to be the hardest word #107days

This week, Week 12, we’re focusing on saying sorry. To kick us off a post from Sara sharing her thoughts and experience.

Saying sorry. A fairly straightforward concept with a handy NHS guide for those who might struggle. We’d planned a week on this topic as it’s fundamental to helping families deal with the unexpected and preventable death/serious harm of a family member. A swift, heartful and genuine apology probably is the most valuable tool the NHS has, in terms of heading off lengthy, painful and ultimately costly battles with families. Sadly, this doesn’t seem to be widely recognised.

This issue is particularly timely as the template response circulated by some Conservative MPs to constituents’ requests for support for the #LBBill includes a paragraph about Sloven and their unreserved apology for LB’s death. This is lifted from the statement by Katrina Percy, CEO of Sloven, on the day the independent review by Verita was published back in February 2014.

Deeplysorry

This apology was made seven months after LB died. Up to this point, I [not our family] received a ‘I was deeply saddened and sorry to hear of the death of your son, Connor’ from the Acting Chief Exec on July 11th 2013. An exemplar non apology. Her sadness comes first, followed by ‘sorry to hear’ and then a second line with ‘sincere condolences’ scattered like confetti. These words are words anyone can say to someone who has experienced bereavement. Not the words you say to someone who has died in your care.

Katrina Percy, the actual CEO, popped up in December 2013 ‘offering my personal and sincere condolences on the death of your son, Connor‘.

Again, a non-apology. Offering condolences is not saying sorry. We had to wait until there was evidence that LB shouldn’t have died before something approaching an apology was made, three months later. Sadly, despite this public statement, and an apparent acceptance of the Verita findings, nine months later Sloven stood in front of the coroner, arguing that LB died of natural causes. Maybe the NHS Being Open policy needs a footnote added to remind CEOs to remain consistent to their apologies.

In August 2014 we received a letter from Katrina Percy that is tooth enamel removing in its toxicity. On the subject of apologies, she has this to say:

Like every single organisation and individual in the world, we are not perfect and on a rare number of occasions we get things wrong, sometimes with deeply distressing consequences. On these rare occasions, my role as Leader is to do everything in mine and my organisation’s powerto offer our deep and sincere apologies, to work with everyone concerned – including relatives and regulators – in as positive and productive a way as possible to learn from what went wrong and to put in place arrangements to try to ensure nothing similar happens in future.

In this regard, I believe it was absolutely right for us to offer our profound and public apologies to you for the death in our care of your son, Connor.

Profound, sincere and deep are just words. Meaning remains absent, sadly. And without meaning you really ain’t sorry.

So this week we will be thinking about saying sorry and apologies. Please share any experiences in the comments section or drop us an email. As we say with tedious regularity, this really ain’t rocket science.

Tongue

Week 5: Censored #107days

We couldn’t let quilt week pass without squeezing in a post about the patch that didn’t make it. Ally Rogers, LB’s cousin, has been a quiet constant of the #JusticeforLB campaign, sending witty tweets and making acerbic observations, that have led to many a dark chuckle in the Justice Shed. Ally is currently completing her undergraduate dissertation, which is due in next week. With a working title of How to Make Friends and Impress People: A Case Study (to be replaced with something more yawningly academic in due course) Ally is conducting a narrative analysis of Sloven’s communications around LB’s ‘care’ and death. 12,000 words looking at the texts on blogs and Sloven’s public statement on their website, focusing on assigned and hidden responsibility for actions. Legend.

When it came to stitching a patch for the Justice Quilt, Ally went for subversive LB style. Committing to fabric LB’s bigoted tendencies, as captured in Sara’s blog post of 2011.

DisabledsPatch

The arrival of this patch into the quilt makers pile posed somewhat of a dilemma for Janet and gang. Was such a blatant statement appropriate for the Justice Quilt? Would it make sense without context? Janet, Janis, Margaret and Jean discussed what to do amongst themselves and took advice from others.

After much careful and sensitive deliberation by the quilting team it was decided not to include the patch in the quilt. A decision not taken lightly.

Instead it proudly sits on the wall of Sara and Rich’s kitchen, as a brilliant conversation starter and chuckle inducer.

Here’s to LB, Ally and all the subversive ones.

Day 107: Honouring LB #107days

Today we come to the end of #107days of action, exactly a year to the day that LB died, whilst in the ‘care’ of Southern Health, an entirely preventable death.

As accidental campaigners we never really could bring ourselves to plan for today, we’ve discussed it often, but nothing felt appropriate. Yesterday we finally settled on today’s action, in keeping with the rest of this entirely crowdsourced campaign, it’s over to you, our amazing, passionate, creative, committed, dedicated network.

We have two options for you today, you’re welcome to do one of them, or both of them (or none of course, it’s really your choice).

Firstly, please leave a comment on this blog post with your ‘take away’ message from #107days; what one memory, or thought, or learning will stick with you. How has LB, and this campaign in his memory, had an impact on you? We’re hoping for lots of comments and you’ll be able to read them as they grow throughout the day. If you’re a blogger and would like to write a post on your own blog please do add a summary, and a link into the comments here. Please remember that comments are moderated, so if your comment doesn’t appear immediately there’s no need to repost it!

Secondly, please change your social media profile pictures to LB for the day. You’re welcome to change it on twitter, or facebook, or tumblr, or instagram, or any combination of the aforementioned sites (and of course any others). We think this collective action will have quite a visual impact, to maximise that please download our profile pic below (right click on the image will allow you to save it to your computer and you can then upload it to twitter) so everyone is using the same black and white pic.

LB_dude

For maximum impact we ask you to only use the picture for the day, we very much hope you’ll join us.

More information on what next for the #JusticeforLB campaign will follow in a couple of weeks. You can follow this blog, or follow us on twitter, or facebook. We will seek your input before we make any decisions, but before we ‘move on’, we’d like to honour LB today.

Thank you all, for your support throughout #107days and today especially.

Day 40: Musings from the Magic Roundabout #107days

We were delighted when Ermintrude offered to write a blog post for #107days. Day 40 shares her thoughts and musings, and we’ve named the post in honour of her pen name, but also in acknowledgement of the constant sense of being stuck on a merry go round in dealings with Southern Health.

merrygoround

This is what Ermintrude had to say in support of #JusticeforLB:

I wanted to write something to remember and honour LB, his family and people who are in similar situations now. I wanted to rage against systems that allowed this to happen but as I’ve read people’s contributions, I realise I can’t add more honesty than those who have experienced the utter despair and despicable treatment in the hands of health and social care professionals.  So I am just pondering some memories, fitting them together and thinking about what I can do to promote better care and better systems for people who have learning disabilities and for all people who are subject to the vagaries of a disjointed and unempathetic system.  Here is my modest contribution.

When I was at school, we had weekly trips to a local residential home for people with learning disabilities. It was billed as ‘community service’. We could go instead of playing hockey. My aim wasn’t very noble when I volunteered, I have to say. I wasn’t very good at sports. Looking back though, at some of those afternoons, I remember how we didn’t really see an us/them and it became more than a way to avoid hockey. We laughed, we joked, we played silly board games, chatted about music and television and school. It became a fun way to spend the afternoons because we were simply hanging out with people who laughed at our jokes and who we enjoyed being around.

Looking back over the thirty years since then, I wonder whether this was really anything revolutionary we were doing. Or if we just need to stop looking for answers and try and find some of the solutions we have already found but just do them better.  I went to university and dabbled in a little voluntary work with older people. I joined one of those countless ‘societies’ which are on offer which did little jobs around the house for older, isolated people. I pity the poor women (it was mostly women I happened to visit) who had me wallpapering their front rooms for them but in my defence, I think, in return, we always chatted for far longer than we worked. Big society. Right.

And then past university, which is where I’m going to settle a while, I picked up on the voluntary work with CSV and went to spend a year in a residential home (with staff accommodation attached as it was in the middle of nowhere) for adults with learning disabilities and epilepsy.

It is here that I’m going to settle a while because it was where I learnt a lot about epilepsy, learning disabilities and the relationships between the two. Everyone who lived in the home had epilepsy. We were given core training in managing situations, particularly when people had seizures and as a new volunteer, while I was supposed to be doing the ‘fun’ stuff in addition to the staff – like taking people out in the local area, running games groups and discussion groups in the evenings and generally just wandering around ‘being sociable’, a big part of my morning routine was supervising baths.

I remember feeling quite awkward initially about having to watch people having baths. Of course, we did it as subtlely as we could. We had privacy curtains surround the bath with a small gap to observe and often I (as all the staff would – this wasn’t something different I did) we would chatter away to people as they sat in the bath, just making sure there were no long silences or that I didn’t monopolise the conversation too much. Always, we listened out for any splashes. I did have to pull the plug out a few times when people had seizures in the bath (that was the first thing we were to do). And thinking of a man, who drowned in an NHS run hospital where the care and supervision should have been there, I often thought back to those days when we would all be taught, from the very junior people like me how to manage seizures in baths, it makes me angry. That was 20 years ago.

I moved on after that job to work in learning disabilities services for a number of years until I qualified as a social worker and switched to work with older adults but a part of my heart stayed there.

So how have we got to a situation where services exist and an organisation exists which provides them in an NHS healthcare setting where the minimum standards were not met. We aren’t talking good quality care here, we are talking about providing dangerous and neglectful care. Care which contributes to the death of people, to the death of Connor.

There are a number of things which can be put into the basket.

Firstly, poor organisations delivering poor services. This is no excuse. This is not about ‘modern’ or ‘not modern’ ways. I was doing this in 1993. I’m sure there were many problems with the places I worked in but they provided far better care, 20 years ago, than Southern Health manages now. And the CEO talks of ‘not working in a modern way’. I wonder how often she has sat outside a bathroom, listening for someone in a bath and listened if they had any seizure that she would have to act on. I wonder. I wonder how often, and maybe I’m misjudging her, she has sat with the people who receive her services, in the settings and environments which have failed to provide the basics like safe seclusion facilities, like functioning defibrillators and listened. Truly listened.  While there are poor services and these services are allowed to continue to exist without censure, we can’t claim that we have a health service to be proud of. I worked in the NHS for many years. I am proud of the work I did. I’ve come across many many wonderful doctors and nurses but as an organisation, we have to be able to criticise parts without being made to feel we are criticising all. Some parts don’t function.

Secondly, and this is linked, poor oversight and lazy commissioning. Commissioners have a responsibility to check the quality of the services which they are paying for and to hold providers to account. They hold the purse-strings and have to be assured that they are happy with what is being provided. This is not about ‘avoiding scandals’ although I fear sometimes it might be. It is about seeking the best. There seems to be a lack of aspiration around some services for people with learning disabilities and my feeling is that this gap is particularly evident in health-based settings. We can talk Winterbourne endlessly and good work may be being done but we need to see more action and less rhetoric. The commissioning and commissioners are lazy because they don’t scrutinise or challenge.

Thirdly, there is the societal assumptions and expectations for people with learning disabilities. We talk about the watershed of Winterbourne but Connor died in the post-Winterbourne landscape. We talk about people moving nearer home as if that is a cure-all but poor care happens near home too. And not everyone has a home to go back to. I remember some work I did once with a man with profound learning disabilities who had no family. We can’t make assumptions about people having families who will advocate and fight for them. As a society we need to fight as strongly as those families might for those without. We fail miserably here. The expectations and assumptions are set low because there isn’t much thought or consideration for difference. Some organisations say the right words but there are often lazy assumptions made.

So is there scope for change?

I hope so. We have developed a health and social care system which is routed in jargon and exclusion. I worked in health and social care for 20+ years and it confuses me. How can we expect others to understand when we can’t ourselves. We have different funding streams and different funding levels for different things. Some pots are mixed up and some are centrally commissioned, some locally commissioned, some contracted out by provider services. Some are charged and some aren’t. What a mess we have created.  Instead of transformation being what it actually means, it has been tacking on poor systems (such as the extra complicated way that personal budgets have been rolled out) onto poor systems. Where is the complete redesign? The NHS moans and groans about too many changes. No, it’s too many of the wrong kinds of changes. There needs to be change. There needs to be integration but there need to be sensible people driving it. People who experience the services as recipients – not those cozied up to each other in Whitehall and local government/CCG silos chatting to the same people they have done for years and exchanging thoughts over golf in Surrey.

My hope is that we can drive these changes. For LB, and for all who need to have their voices amplified so that things can move on. Because they need to.